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Pregnancy. It started out with a weird stomach/ back ache that kept me from sleeping for a few nights. Once I found out what back labor was I realized it was very similar. I couldn’t lie down without a deep ache ringing around my entire lower abdomen.
It was so early on that the hormone levels weren’t high enough to register on the usual pee test. I’d seen the general practice doctor and they drew some blood to make sure. Blood tests are way more sensitive and can detect the hormone (HCG) before those home kit tests. I got a call on a Saturday morning from the GP with the news that yes, I was pregnant.
I wasn’t happy. I was sad and worried. This amount of discomfort wasn’t normal from what I’d read, and the GP was concerned it could be ectopic. And if that were the case, I wasn’t really pregnant at all. More blood tests over the next week tracked the HCG levels. If they went up, I was really pregnant. If they stayed the same, I was looking at an ectopic pregnancy or miscarriage situation. Hence the worry. However, the worry was needless as the hormone levels went up appropriately and an ultrasound showed a little splotch right where it should be. Hello little dot!
For the first trimester, I was cautious. I was afraid to be happy or excited because I knew that miscarriages
are actually pretty common. It took a long time to feel real. There was no instantaneous moment when I felt like I knew for sure there was a tiny person bopping around in there, but more like a gradual dawning. By the seventh month or so when my entire stomach was doing a dance I had pretty much come to grips with the concept.
When we found out the gender, we were thrilled. After the ultrasound we sat in the waiting room at the doctor grinning like idiots. I was shocked, because I was convinced it was a boy. Most people guessed boy. Most people were wrong.